Choosing your dress
At Joy Bridal Boutique, we try to kibosh the concept of “the dress”
Ever since the debut of “Say Yes to the Dress” in 2007, dress shopping had changed forever. In some ways positive, as it made dress shopping a more memorable experience for brides…however it created very unrealistic expectations for future brides. Especially for millennials, we were being spoon-fed from a young age the ideas that there was only one perfect wedding dress, and that our brain would signal an emotional response making the decision relatively easy. Which is not the case! Combine this, with our world of social media and thousands of wedding dresses being thrown in our face, it’s a recipe for disaster!
In reality, there are thousands of incredible dresses out there- and in a perfect world we would get to wear at least 5 different wedding dresses, but unless your Queen of Genovia and having a week long event… that’s not realistic. Instead, most brides will only end up choosing one- MAYBE two, especially when spending a lot of money on one dress- you want to wear it all night long! But this does make choosing super challenging! Because we are hoping that there will be one obvious choice and only one that we love! We think it’s important to go into dress shopping with the understanding that you will likely love a few different gowns and can picture yourself getting marred in them all for different reasons! One might be more comfortable, another more affordable, one might be covered in gorgeous detailing, but other timelessly elegant.
So, if this is the case… how do you make a decision? Here are some helpful tips when choosing your dress.
1- Don’t over shop. There is a sweet spot between exploring options, and shopping too much because both can contribute to dress regret. Try strategically picking about 3 boutiques you want to visit.
2 - Make sure you don’t just try on things you want to try on.. also be sure to try on a few things you DON’T want. JUST to be sure. It doesn’t mean that because you think you want fitted, you need to try on 20 ball gowns to be sure. But at least a couple just so that you don’t see a picture of something online and go “Wow, I didn’t think I would want something like that but it looks SO stunning, I wish I gave it a try”.
3- It sounds obvious, but don’t go dress shopping unless you feel ready to buy. Even once you are ready, it’s STILL a hard commitment, so going shopping too early or when you don’t feel ready commit will make things more confusing.
4- Choose who you bring wisely. Bringing the wrong or just too many people can make things harder. Also, if you are bringing an opinionated group make sure you are confident to choose for yourself, don’t go in expecting everyone to fall in love with the same one you do. It can be lovely to include grandma- but don’t be disappointed when you have different tastes in dresses… Just know it’s totally ok! And just because the one you love most might not be their first pick too- doesn't mean they don’t like it.
5- Let your venue and aesthetic help you decide. Of course, if you fall madly in love with a dress that doesn’t totally suit your original vision or venue - who cares! A wedding dress will never look out of place at a wedding. BUT, because there are SO many amazing choices it can help make the decision easier. Costs aside we could gladly have 5 different weddings, choose 5 different venues, and wear a different dress at each venue. But some things you love, might be more suited to your vision and venue than another!
6- Decide what is important to you BEFORE trying things on. That doesn’t mean there isn’t room for change, but it will help you navigate your priorities from the beginning. Is it important to you to highlight your figure? Stay under budget? Pair well with certain accessories? Be comfortable for dancing? Wear something unique? Decide what elements you want to prioritize so that if it doesn’t fall under that checklist- is it worth it?
Here is a few things to ask yourself
1 - Would I be choosing this one for myself, or someone else?
2- Am I physically comfortable? And If not, is it worth it/do I care? Or is there something I can change that will make it more comfortable?
3- Can I picture this at my venue?
4- Is it in budget, and if not, is it worth it to me? Would I be happier with my third choice under budget, or first choice over budget?
5- Am I mentally comfortable? Does the dress make me feel confident or will I be self conscious all day?
Any if you are stuck between 2 or 3. Don’t think of it as 1 right choice and 2 wrong choices. Understand you have 3 right choices.
Once you decide, here are few things to keep in mind
When getting caught up in social media and beautiful gowns you see online (because it will happen!) Just know that its ok! And it’s totally normal. Just because you see another dress you love- it doesn’t mean you chose wrong. You just need to change your mentality. Instead of thinking “Ugh, I wish I could wear that dress instead’, you need to think “Wow, I wish I could that dress too”. Because liking other dresses doesn’t take away from yours- they aren’t mutually exclusive.
Once you choose your fiancé, you don’t feel the need to keep dating. We all know there are a million people out there and we could fall in love with someone else. But we don’t feel the need to keep going on dates because we are happy with our partner! Try and think of your dress the same way. You will cross pass with and many more people every day, just as you will see dresses- but you don’t need to try them on.